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After a thorough investigation, these are our key findings. “You might be working at 2 a.m., but your spouse is too.”Based on Brandwin’s intel, CIA Christmas parties must be pretty awkward with all of these inter-CIA marriages.

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In works of pop culture about Russian spies like “Getting romantically involved with your asset is the biggest no-no there is.Now you’re dating someone else who knows how to do this,” Brandwin said. That means he may have had to use binoculars to see what I was doing. Though pop culture would tell you otherwise, spies aren't glamour magnets like James Bond.“There’s a saying within the agency, ‘Don’t case officer me.’ As in, I know your tricks. You have to remember to be a normal human being.”One of Brandwin’s operative boyfriends took the application of spying in a relationship to a new, literal level. During the storm, the man called and asked how Brandwin was doing.“I was like, ‘Oh, I have to scrape off my car. In fact, covert operations officers have to hide behind a disguise of dullness.Dating amid a pool of “government sanctioned liars” can be complicated.“At spy school, you get the black book on how to lie and manipulate. But he did a lovely job on the car,” Brandwin said.Emily Brandwin worked as a Disguise Officer and an Operations Officer at the Central Intelligence Agency where she was deployed all over the globe working on mission critical operations.

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If the person is not American, you must decide whether you're prepared to scale the CIA’s mountain of bureaucracy for love.

The CIA requires its employees to submit paperwork for any foreign national with whom they have “close and continuing contact,” which begins after two dates.“A lot of men have one night stands because they don’t have to report it.

But unlike Theroux, they wouldn't involve their significant others in European shootouts.

“That would never happen,” Brandwin said, laughing.

At the urging of her "spy nut" of a mother, Brandwin applied for a mysterious posting at the CIA — and got it.